There are a few reasons I haven't posted much... this is one of them. No one wants to listen to this all the time, I know I don't...
I am just so frustrated with this stupid disease (s).
Rheumatoid Arthritis and Lupus.
I have this amazing group of people that I email loop with and some of them have been dealing with these diseases, one or both for more than 20 years... I can't believe they haven't lost their minds after so long... some days I feel like I will.
The whole low pressure/rain/storm thing combined with the stress of the beginning of school (I guess) sent me into a flare. I just want it to end and it won't. I am tired, cranky and in so much pain. I do take the vicodin... not steadily, but I take them... a half here, a half there, a whole one in the evening... etc.
I am going to see about getting duragesic patches and the voltaren patches when I go to the rheumy tomorrow. They send the pain meds directly to the source. If I could kill the pain in my hip, it would be great...it hurts when I sit, stand, lay... ack.
That's another thing... I am DREADING tomorrow.
Hubby will be with me, which is great, but here is the days schedule:
Drop kids at school at 8am, head immediately into NYC for appt. After appt head back out (pray no traffic etc) meet kids for 12:30pm dismissal. 4pm, take kids and friends to bowling. 5:30 dinner, then 7pm be back at school for back to school night until 9pm. ACK. Somewhere in that break before bowling... I am going to nap. I hope.
However, I know that will annoy Hubby. I just can't win. Why will it annoy him? Because he took off the day to be with me for the docs and the kids, and he will selfishly not understand that if I don't get the nap I will fall over. ACK.
I can't blame him, I wish I were the way I was, too.
Every year it is the same thing... every few months the same battle. Can I keep doing this? Yes, of course, I have to... for my kids, if not for myself, but today I am having a big ole PITY PARTY as I contemplate that this is how it has been for years now, and how it will be for the foreseeable future.
I know I have the strength in me somewhere to get thru it and get myself back into a positive frame of mind, but sometimes I am just so tired.
So, all the prayers, kind thoughts, and positive energy you can spare to be sent my way would be appreciated.
Thanks for reading...
be well,
Dawn