Monday, May 1, 2006

Maybe, I won't be Good

Why?

Why do I always have to be good?

Why do I have to be the one to be kind?  To be helpful?  To be forgiving?

Why do I have to be the one to put everyone elses needs first?

Why?

Maybe, I won't do that anymore.

Maybe, I want to be selfish.

Maybe, I want to angry.

Maybe, I just want to scream.

'I AM MAD AS HELL AND I AM NOT GOING TO TAKE IT ANYMORE!'

Maybe, I just want to be seen.

Maybe, I want it to be about me for a change. 

My wants, my desires, my hopes, my dreams, my needs.

Maybe.

Maybe, I am just frustrated.

Maybe, it is the pain.

Maybe, I am justified.

Maybe.

 

Needed to rant and rave tonight, sorry J-Land.

Be well,
Dawn

11 comments:

lrttklly said...

Rant away, Dawn!
Sounds like you need to tend to yourself.
(((((Gentle Hugs))))))
Even Jesus took off and went to the desert for awhile.
We all need a break from the status quo.
Hope you find what you're looking for.
Love,
Loretta

stansgirl2004 said...

I can relate and it's always good to rant a liitle so let it all out
I love the talk to the paw graphic  LOL
Hugs, Marina

lurkynat said...

Dearest Dawn,
I'm listening Buddy! tell us all what's going on.. I am so very sorry about your pain really. I will hold you in my thoughts and prayers.
I love you dearly Dawn. I wish you bright days full of love.
natalie

eml625 said...

Hope your feeling better.

Hugs,
Ellen

sangrialel said...

You can rant anytime you want!!!  Linda

klconard1 said...

Dawn dear -- been there -- done that --- camped out for an extended period of time and brought home the tee shirt along with various other souveniers.  You know it; you've seen my whines and my rants.  It's good to share and good to rant sometimes.  And especially good to have friends who understand and love you.
--- in the end, spending time with the Lord (and this includes asking Him all of those questions and then hearing His answer) was what soothed my heart and all of my questions, bringing me peace within.
I'm glad you posted, dearheart.  I am praying for you right now.
loving you
karyl

tishgray0726 said...

You have just said everything that I have been thinking and feeling since my husband walked out on me.  It gets very hard.  However, when we continue to do the next right thing even when no one is looking we get blessed.  Sometimes we get our blessings right away. Sometimes we have to work hard for it.  I thank you for being here for me and I want you to know that I am here for you.  So have your moment.  This too shall pass.  Hugs.  Tish

cdittric77 said...

Dawn,
You go - let it out, because you know that better out than in is my motto. You are entitled to the same love, respect, and kindness that you constantly bestow on others. You are a compassionate, kind, caring, love-filled, holy woman. That is worth cheering!

WOOOOOOOOOO DAWN!!!

Peace and love,
Charley
http://journals.aol.com/cdittric77/courage

tlgf1968 said...

you don't always HAVE to be good, kind, helpful, forgiving ... dawn.  you do it because you have integrity.  the kind that oprah spoke of when she said, "real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody's going to know whether you did it or not."  even "O" has "one of those days" every once in a while, right?

rant (& rave) on, my friend!

sdoscher458 said...

Because it is in your nature to be so.  There is something intangible that radiates from good people, maybe a personal auora - something, I can't explain it but I've felt it, seen it and loved the people who possessed it.  I had someone once say to me that people with good souls have lived many lives before. I don't really know, but it is good to have a friend such as you.  Hope that you feel better, wish that wishes could make you better...sorry I haven't been writing that much..too much sewing going on...take care....Sandi

gdireneoe said...

Hey my friend...we need phone time.  YGM. ;)  C.  http://journals.aol.com/gdireneoe/thedailies