So, it is raining, yet again.
I should not complain since we had a glorious weekend, no rain and low humidity. It was probably the mildest 4th of July weekend (as far as blazing heat goes) in at least 20 years of recent Northern NJ history.
The humidity, so thick you can chew the air, returned yesterday afternoon and with that comes the rain. It rained all night. It rained this morning. It drizzled at 4pm and then began the all out deluge at 5:30 pm.
All last night and all day today my hands and feet have been screaming. I went to bed early hoping to stave off some of the agony. No go. I napped this afternoon, also hoping for some relief. No go.
UGH. This rain is wreaking havoc on my joints.
Yesterday, one of my RA email loop friends reached out via email about how fed up and tired she was of being tired.
I responded with this following email:
"I think our only choice is to psyche ourselves up mentally when we wake up, that we are excited, that we are happy to greet the new day with a bounce in our step. I haven't felt that way in a long time. I know you haven't either. I doubt many of us have at all.
Mentally, or emotionally, I can get myself revved up about something (like the cruise) and then I can push the nagging swelling and pain to the back burner. It is still there, I just deny it and chose to ignore.
I have come to believe that this is in fact, the best I can do.
And it sucks....and some days on the roller coaster of dealing with this stupid disease I am cruising up the hill on a high, pushing the shit to the background and able to ignore.
Other days, I am crashing down the hill and hitting rock bottom, fed up, tired of being tired, and pissed off to hell that it has to be this way. We all ride this coaster, but at least we have eachothers hands to hold.
Thanks for reaching out and grabbing mine...let's try to climb back together!!!!"
Damn, I write a good "chin up" speech don't I?
Too bad today I am not doing very well at taking my own advice.
Today, I, too, am tired of being tired, sore of being sore.
I know I should probably reach out to my email loop for some of the same medicine a good dose of optimism via email, however, I am too cranky to even do that.
Instead, I am going to eat some sugar-free Peppermint Patties (thanks to RA/prednisone - I am watching the sugar thing) and play an online game like Phlinx.
Be well everyone,