Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Love Bites

This reads:  I'm in your physics lab testing your string theory.  I love it!   Hammer totally cracked up.  So did I.  Physics is such a part of our family culture.  (If you are interested in String Theory and it being made easy to understand, read Brian Greene)

On to what's on my mind... love... marriage... bickering... stress...

Oh yeah, it has been a fun 2 months or so here in Dawn-land.

I've mentioned that Hubby has been stressed in the last year because of work situations.  He really needs to put time into getting the hell outta this place, but alas, life keeps happening to put that off.

So, take normal family stress and add the stress of issues with work, to the stress of a flaring sick wife, to the stress of flaring sick wife NOW getting a brain thingy... well, you can imagine. 

It's enough to make any man a little stressed out to the max.

Unfortunately, that meant Hubby being way overstressed, and had him dealing with it all in 'his' way, and me wanting him to be completely different in how he was dealing with me.

So, there was lots of quiet, separated by lots of bickering. 

Thankfully, whatever flare or exacerbation of my disease(s) has settled down.  I am not having the numbness, tingling and burning sensations.  I have not had episodes of weakness.  The fatigue has lessened.  I am not 'normal', or anywhere near where I 'used' to be, but 'better' is what I have right now, and I am very happy with it.

However, the stressful tension between Hubby and I is still there. 

Hubby has tried to 'make up for' and ease it, and so have I, usually at different times, and with varying results.  Jokingly, I emailed him not to worry, he was still my favorite person to hate, and I loved him, just haven't liked him very much lately.

<sigh>  I wish money and time could just allow us to take some time for ourselves.  We desperately need that at this point, but it just isn't going to happen.  The kids come first, bottom line, and all extra anything of late, has gone straight to them and their activities, as it should be.

Marriage is a complicated thing.  I have likened it to a roller coaster at times, much like life.  Ups, downs, and careening curves in between, and all of it usually happening to damn fast. 

Sometimes all you can do is hang on for dear life. 

And, know in your heart, it will all be fine.

So, yeah, as Def Leppard sings 'love bites, love bleeds', but time heals... when the love is real.

Just need a little 'Patience'.  Wow, that all came together nicely didn't it?  lol

be well,



deshelestraci said...

I love this kitten physics thing!  And the darth vadar pug is too funny!  I know what you mean about our hubbies.  Can't help but love them.  Can't help but hate them.  All at the same time.  Crazy.  No one told me about this aspect of marriage!

tenyearnap said...

Sounds like you have a good marriage...not all can go through these things and stay married and even less stay really liking each other. Good for you!
Lex got a laugh over that pug. He's all about Star Wars these days.

tendernoggle said...

MArriage is not always perfect...like people it has it's good and bad moments...the thing is to remember the "soul" of the other person that you love...the goodness of them.
love ya,

coelha said...

You have a healthy marriage..things will eventually work out; keep hanging on.  You'll always have eachother!  I just wish the stress would ease off for awhile--stress is just not healthy.  I hope you two can get away-even if its just a nice walk somewhere by yourselves, or a movie night.  Take care now!  Hugs - Julie

sangrialel said...

Dawn I hope that things get better soon and that the stress lesses somehow.  Linda

cherry2sweet2eat said...

aw atleast he is still by your side thats what counts.

wildautumn1 said...

Sounds like you have a lot going on - don't forget it is just as important to take time for each other as it is for your kids.  Feeling more relaxed & stronger together trickles down to our little ones! The both of you are lucky to have each other!  

gehi6 said...

The kitten testing ur string therry made me laugh. I treasure a good laugh. Sorry husband is stressed. Hope time eases those feeling along with a lightening of your symptoms.  It must be hard, too, for you to accept these flare-ups when you know they stress family.  I think it takes courage to be the sick one, too.  Struggling hard to recover strength. Which I know you are.  Gerry  http://journals.aol.com/gehi6/daughters-of-the-shadow-men/  

layla44808 said...

great pictures..I'll have to learn how to get some of mine in my journal.
Slowly but surely..lol.

eml625 said...

I'm glad your feeling better.....marriage sure is a lot of work , I agree. Day in Day out, month in month out !!! LOL.


dpoem said...

Easiest way to have lots of fun:  Go to the park with hubby, people watch, and make up stories about the other couples you see.  


jckfrstross said...

you and hubby need a night away. Go to a park and take a long walk or go and park like you were teenagers lol. praying for you both


helmswondermom said...

I agree that you guys need a little time alone with each other away from home.  I hope maybe you get get a night or a weekend away together.

toonguykc said...

You're right about the rollercoaster thing...you just have to hang on!!


psychfun said...

And it is no different for single people either! HA! To think I love rollercoasters...ugh!

donejustwrite said...

Hang in there...

lurkynat said...

I love you so much Dawn! so sorry for all of the stress Sweetie!
lots of hugs and quiet thoughts sent your way

sunnyside46 said...

love is like that....when you can't stand each other, you just hang on until you come out on the other side of it.